


How To Romance a Lady

by NonbinaryHylian (chicagoartnerd)



Category: Transformers (Bay Movies), Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers Generation One
Genre: 1980s, California, Cunnilingus, F/F, Foursome - F/F/M/M, Historical References, Jealousy, Multi, Oblivious, Pining, Sticky Sexual Interfacing, Strap-Ons, Temporarily Unrequited Love, Underage Drinking, Valve Play (Transformers), Xeno
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-15
Updated: 2019-09-06
Packaged: 2020-10-11 10:34:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,437
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20544722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chicagoartnerd/pseuds/NonbinaryHylian
Summary: Charlie meets Astoria Carlton-Ritz while working at the Garden Valley mall. Charlie is oblivious to how much Astoria likes her until they go out on their first date. A date that Charlie didn't even realize was a date till the very end of said night together.And they both didn't realize that they knew transformers until they become trapped alive during the 1989 Loma Prieta earthquake.After a daring rescue from the Autobots things get awkward when Powerglide and Bumblebee realize Charlie and Astoria are dating. Jealousy and egos abound until they confront the bots and work out a satisfying arrangement.It sure is a good thing Astoria is skilled at organizing large events...





	How To Romance a Lady

Charlie had blown through the Brighton Falls technical college mechanic program in less than the required two years and had decided to apply to Standford’s Aerospace Robotics program. She didn’t have any illusions on if they would accept her, her grades from high school were average, but she could build an internal combustion engine from scratch in two days. If they even bothered to ask her technical school instructors they would give her reluctant praise. 

The whole program had been dudes except for her. 

Charlie figured they’d probably say she was good...for a girl. She had come there to learn, to get better at the stuff she already knew well, and she had. It didn’t matter than they had all sneered at her, tried to push her around. She had never been a pushover and she never would be. Charlie had hunkered down and ground away at the programs requirements in quiet determination. She had passed every test, every practical, and kept going. If they wanted to just dismiss her now that she was gone it didn’t matter. She knew she was skilled. Whatever. 

She knew robots. 

Probably better than anyone else on Earth right now. Bumblebee was gonna need her help again, she knew he was out there somewhere right now fighting in a war she didn’t know too much about. Charlie did know she had to be able to repair him. She had to try at least. 

But while she was waiting for the inevitable rejection letter from Stanford she had to support herself somehow. That meant toiling away at the Orange Julius in the Garden Valley mall’s food court. It was about as stimulating a job as working at the Corn Dog Hut on the Brighton Falls boardwalk but at least she could afford to live in San Francisco. 

Sure she was in the rundown part of The Haight but she knew her dad would have been excited for her. She was living above the bookstore where Jefferson Airplane played their first few gigs, along with three other roommates. She was within walking distance of Haight St. and the I-Beam, there was always rock concerts happening there, she never lacked for afterwork entertainment. 

Due to living in “The Big City” now she had to leave the C1 in her Mom’s garage. It was in pristine working order and her new neighbors wouldn’t hesitate to boost it. Charlie had bought a shitty brown 1971 Ford pinto with her 20th birthday money and she drove it everyday back and forth to work. It wasn’t as glamorous as the corvette, and it certainly wasn’t a yellow and black camaro, but it got her there and back. And nobody wanted to steal it. Which was really the best she could have hoped for at this point. 

She spent her Sundays off doing repairs on local muscle cars, she already had several regular customers. She would throw her tool kits in the back of her shitty car and go on house calls. Sometimes she would roll up to the bar they all parked in front of, rows of gleaming classic cars, and wait for someone to approach her. The first couple of times they had ignored her so she had shrugged and worked on swiftly tuning up the pinto. Fast and efficient enough of the old guys notice and came over to ask her what she knew. After that she became a regular face and they mostly accepted her presence. Working on cars was always therapeutic for her, almost meditative. She would fall into the headspace of repair, her hands covered in grease and oil, tools hot from the engine blocks barely cooling off in the California sun. Charlie didn’t want to get rusty only working food service after all. 

Overall her life didn’t suck, sure there was a distinct lack of giant robots, and her day job was mind numbingly boring, but overall things could have been worse.

That’s what she kept telling herself as she gazed out blankly from behind the bright orange countertops. Hey, at least now she smelled like oranges instead of fry grease. Probably an improvement for anyone getting near enough to her to notice. Not that that list of people was particularly long. 

Another thing of note was the mall’s speakers weren’t playing another bubble gum pop song by one of the many Tiffanys, instead they were blasting “Hotel California.” She was gonna have to find whoever was DJ-ing the songs and high five them for that one. 

_You can check out any time you like but you can never leave. _

Yeah that about summed up working in the Garden Valley mall. 

A customer in a large purple sun hat waved a white gloved hand in front of her face to get her attention. And that was the first time Charlie met Astoria Carlton-Ritz. She ordered a large of their signature drink haughtily and Charlie made it mechanically and that was it. 

Later she tried to remember if there was anything else special about that first meeting but she didn’t think so. Just another rich, spoiled, preppy customer demanding she make them a smoothie. 

Then she kept coming back. 

And she kept trying to talk to her. 

Charlie usually had her entire prefrontal cortex turned off during work, it made capitalism easier to suffer through. Yet here was this woman, a few years older than her, trying to talk to her about things other than how the soft serve machine was broken again. She mostly responded in monosyllabic sentences at first. This went on for weeks, she was coming by the Orange Julius everyday it seemed. Charlie started to pay a little bit more attention to her then. 

Astoria appeared to be alone, but on closer inspection Charlie noticed an especially buff guy in an ill-fitting suit always following behind her about ten paces. And another guy, not as conspicuous, across the food court watching her as well. So she had two bodyguards, huh. 

Okay so not your garden variety rich Californian yuppie. 

Then Charlie actually looked at the card she was handing her to pay for her drinks while she tried to chatter at her excitedly about the latest outfit she’d managed to find matching shoes for on Rodeo Drive. It was a fucking black amex. Astoria Carlton-Ritz, yeah that wasn’t a poor person’s name to be sure. It was familiar too. She was some sort of tech company heiress or something? 

Which might have made her someone worth talking to except the only things she wanted to talk to Charlie about were high fashion and fancy parties. Both things she knew very pathetically little about. Astoria had tried to invite her to one of the fancy parties she was hosting and Charlie had turned her down flat. One, she had nothing to wear to a gala of all things. Two, she was going to an ACT UP protest with her roommate Ash who was a member of the Golden Gate branch. She made sure to mention that loudly and pointedly to see if Astoria was gonna have a problem with that. They definitely wouldn’t talk again if she was a homophobe or something.

But instead she had nodded seriously and responded. “Of course! That’s very important and probably far more urgent than my gala. I didn’t know you were so civically minded but if it makes any difference the gala is to raise money for the United Council of Human Services in downtown San Francisco.”

Charlie had hesitated then. Maybe there was more to Astoria than she had originally believed. 

The other thing she noticed about Astoria was she tipped...actually surprisingly well. She’d always drop a tenner in the tip jar before she left. An absurd amount of money considering her drink cost $2. Charlie wasn’t about to point that out though, she needed the tips.

Then one day Astoria mentioned something Charlie actually knew something about. Robots.

It was an offhand comment but it piqued her interest anyway. To be fair she had been looking for something to respond to from her in depth to for a while now. She oddly didn’t hate Astoria, even though they arguably couldn’t have been more different. She offered her a welcome distraction from staring dead eyed at the Chinese restaurant’s giant flashing panda sign directly across from her in the food court for one thing. 

Astoria was lively in a way that was infectious. Always moving, her animated, pretty face always smiling or rolling her eyes, her hands punctuating her words. It was fun to watch. And it made her days feel less long whenever she came by to chat with her. Today was one of the longer days she was on shift so she was very glad to see her. She was wearing a navy blue sailor style dress, complete with a little white nautical collar and red ribbon in the center of her chest. Her wide white sun hat didn’t hide her face as she was sitting up on the counter, leaning over it while Charlie cleaned out some of the metal ice cream mixing cups in the sink. 

Astoria waved one of her hands and the thick chunky navy and white bracelets on it clacked loudly over the hiss of the water. “Hybrid Tech’s shares are up this month because we’re about to announce a new robotics breakthrough so I’m holding a party for the announcement of our new autonomous product line. It’s got to be something bigger than when we celebrated our 10th anniversary, even though we’re coming up on our 20th. Ah father was still alive for that one though. He always did know how to give an inspiring presentation. I don’t think I have his way words, and I didn’t inherit either of my parent’s brains for programming or engineering.”

Two things they had in common to talk about then. Robots and dead dads. Not that Charlie wanted to bring up her dad in conversation with Astoria, she rarely talked about him with anyone. She jumped on the robotics mention instead. “Autonomous robots, like are they intelligent then? Can they make complex decisions on their own? What kind of processing power do they have? Do they need to be plugged into a wall or can they run on a battery of some sort? If they’re battery operated what’s their energy output?”

Astoria paused and looked at her with wide blue eyes. Charlie belatedly realized she’d never said so many words to her all at once before. She blushed a little and looked away from her. This spurred Astoria into action though. She leaned towards her, eyes brightly interested. “I don’t know the specifics as it’s not something I’m really interested in, but if you want to know, I can get a report on it from one of my lead engineers.”

Charlie mumbled back. “Oh don’t worry about it. I just applied for Stanford’s Robotics program this fall so it’s something I’m passionate about.”

Astoria did an excited little wave as she slammed her hand down on the spotless orange counter in front of her making Charlie jump a little. “Stanford! You must be really smart then, is that what you do when you’re not here? Build robots?”

Charlie blushed so hard it made her face ache. She wasn’t, that wasn’t. She could lie and say something like ‘sure I’m smart and I’m totally going to get into work at Stanford’s Aerospace Robotics lab in a few months.’ But she wanted to keep maybe talking to Astoria after she inevitably got her rejection letter so she sighed and told the truth. “I mean I applied, I haven’t gotten in yet or anything. I know how to build a 1959 Corvette C1 from spare parts but I’ve never written a line of code in my entire life. I don’t think my grades really scream Stanford either, but I’m trying at any rate.” She scratched the back of her neck nervously and looked down for a moment at the dishes still in the sink before glancing back up at her.

Astoria frowned for a second but then the crease in between her perfectly plucked brown eyebrows smoothed out she smiled at her again. “You know how to build them then, coding them is a separate thing I think. And hey nobody knows everything! Technology hates me, well most technology, anything more complicated than a car tends to break right underneath me. My father used to call it my ‘techno jinxing power.’ It made pursuing engineering impossible. If you can make one from scratch you’re no slouch in the brains department. Not like me anyway, I was never very good at science or math in school. Lucky for me I didn’t need to be to be a pretty, brainless, little heiress.”

Charlie immediately wanted to deny that. Sure Astoria hadn’t talked about anything but clothes and party planning the entire time she’d been by to see her but that didn’t mean she wasn’t smart too. Or at least competent and skilled at that she knew. They had different areas of expertise but that wasn’t a bad thing.

Charlie moved over from the sink and wiped her wet hands on her jeans before self consciously patting Astoria on the shoulder shoulder. “Hey no, that’s not true either. It takes a lot of brain power to keep all the stuff you talk about straight and orderly in your mind. You know all the names, business numbers, and abilities of all the best designers, caterers, party planners in country off the top of your head! Just because all that stuff isn’t seen as ‘smart’ doesn’t mean you aren’t. There’s more than one type of intelligence Astoria.”

Huh. She had been paying more attention to Astoria’s excited chattering than she had thought she had been. It paid off because she was looking at her with amazement. “Charlie, has anyone ever told you you’re a real peach? Because you’re like a total sweetheart. Are we friends do you think?”

She had just been hit with a double whammy of cute compliments and then _ that _. Charlie stammered out something that was probably an affirmative answer and Astoria lit up like the sun before her and grabbed both her hands in hers excitedly. “Wonderful! Then how would you like to come with me to a concert this Friday? It’s after the mall closes, I can come and get you from here or your house. Whatever works, ah if you want to that is. No pressure.”

It certainly didn’t feel like there was no pressure with her holding her hands tightly in her own. 

Uh. Charlie had no idea what kind of concert she was being invited to, probably something classical or opera? Some event she didn’t own an outfit fancy enough to attend no doubt. But to her surprise she did want to go. Maybe to just hang out with someone other than her three roommates at the old bearded dudes at the muscle car drag nights. It didn’t matter what kind of concert it was as long as she didn’t have to go alone. She could handle a little Handel. 

Charlie sighed and pulled her hands away carefully. “Yeah. Um I mean that sounds good. I close up around 8 any way. I can meet you out front in the parking lot.”

Astoria seemed a little nonplussed that she had actually said yes, but only for a beat before she steamrolled right on ahead giddily. Talking about how excited she was and how much fun they were going to have. Charlie didn’t regret it immediately, though she was starting to feel that familiar weird fluttering anxiousness in her stomach. It was the same one she got before a big dive meet. That lurch of her stomach right before she jumped the final time and threw herself from the highest board, plummeting 33 feet down into the cold water below. 

She absolutely didn’t spend the rest of the week looking forward to Friday night. Or thinking anxiously about how Friday night would go. Or worrying what she should wear. Nope. 

After her shift ended on Friday she changed out of her orange and white shirt with the Orange Julius devil on it, in the back among all the boxes of drink mix, into her second nicest black t-shirt. This one didn’t have any holes in it and it said “Ramones” over the band’s presidential seal on it in white. It was May so she didn’t need her leather jacket but she put it on anyway. 

Gotta add some stylish flair somehow to her faded black jeans and docs. 

When she exited out the employee entrance there was a black Bentley idling out there. The window rolled down and Astoria stuck her head out and waved at her enthusiastically. Charlie blinked at her in surprise. 

Her hair, which was usually shiny brown and long and straight, was now crimped and teased up big and poofy. She must have used a whole can of Aqua Net on it. She was also wearing electric blue eyeshadow and bright pink lipstick.

Charlie opened the door and got in as Astoria scooted over on the leather seat to make room for her. She was wearing a white leopard print mini dress with a big black leather studded belt and Charlie couldn’t help but stare a little bit. 

Astoria noticed of course and she blushed a bit while waving at Charlie airily. “Oh! Are you admiring this old rag then? Everyone will be dressed way more trashy than me where we’re going.”

Charlie didn’t know how to respond to that. So she huffed a laugh and gestured at her own shirt. “I wasn’t judging I just suddenly feel a little under dressed.”

Astoria didn’t try to hide her appreciation as she stared at Charlie up and down and Charlie tried not to squirm under the attention as she spoke to her. “What? No. No you look really good. You look just like Joan Jett, which is kinda funny seeing as how we’re about to go see Lita Ford.”

She hadn’t been expecting that. All of that. Before she could stop herself she sputtered. “You like hair metal!?”

Astoria hunched her shoulders defensively and didn’t look at her as the Bentley started to move. “What? Am I not allowed to like it just because I’m hella girly or something? We’re going to the Maidens of Metal night at The Calico. There are lots of women who like metal okay.”

Charlie immediately put her hands up to show she didn’t mean anything by it. “Uh no! You’re allowed to like whatever music you want, I just wasn’t, um, expecting you to like that kind of music. I guess I shouldn’t have assumed anything. We haven’t really talked about music before.”

Astoria let the tension drain out of her shoulders as she relaxed back against the leather seat back. “What kind of music did you think we were going to go listen to tonight then? Duran Duran? Madonna? Wham!?”

Charlie snorted and then responded sheepishly. “Actually, I thought we might be going to the San Francisco Symphony or something. You just, ah I guess I assumed some stuff about you based on how you dressed and acted when at the mall.” She looked at her seriously as she continued. “That was wrong. I apologize for putting my foot directly in my mouth, it does make it kinda hard to speak around it though. I’m sorry.”

Astoria giggled at that and swatted Charlie’s arm playfully. She could only stare at her owlishly as she smirked at her. “You’re forgiven. You’re not the first person to make a lot of assumptions about me and you certainly won’t be the last. But now that you know what kind of music I like, what kind of music do you like? Let me guess, the Ramones?” Astoria wagged her eyebrows and pointed at Charlie’s shirt.

Now it was her turn to laugh. “Yeah I like the Ramones. Rock N’ Roll Highschool was my dad’s favorite movie, we used to watch it all the time.” Charlie quickly moved on to her other favorite bands. “Uh The Smiths, The Cure, The Clash, The Pretenders, lots of the-s huh? Joan Jett, Stevie Nicks, Pat Benatar, Blondie, Heart. Queen and Zeppelin, but everyone loves Queen and Zeppelin. Hm. On the more poppy side uh, Prince? Around the World in a Day is a masterpiece.”

Astoria nodded thoughtfully. “Prince is always fantastic. Agreed on all the ladies. I don’t really like many bands fronted by guys. They kinda annoy me. I mean I make an exception for some I really like: Queen, AC/DC, Motley Crue. I like hair metal specifically because it’s a lot of folks expressing their more femminine aesthetics as power fantasies. Alice Cooper and Twisted Sister being good examples.”

Charlie was taken aback again. She wasn’t expecting critical culture and media analysis from Astoria. She really had to stop making assumptions about her. It would be easier, and more honest of her to just to have no expectations and take Astoria as she was.

Charlie cleared her throat. “That’s...yeah I can see that. And that’s really cool. That you like hair metal because of that I mean. A lot of my own musical taste came from stuff my dad listened to. I guess I should, I dunno, diversify it more now that I’m out on my own?” Her response sounded weak to her own ears but Astoria didn’t seem to mind.

Astoria leaned in closer to her now, listening intently. “Is that your way of gently saying you don’t like hair metal but are going to humor me tonight?”

Charlie could feel her face heating up a little but she didn’t look away from her. “I wouldn’t say I don’t like it, it’s just not something I listen to a lot of. You’ll have to be the expert tonight and tell me all about it. And like what’s good and stuff.”

Astoria grabbed her hand again and Charlie didn’t stop her, she just stared at her surprised as she spoke passionately. “Charlie you don’t need me to tell you what’s good! You’ve got your own kind of taste you know what you like. I hope we both have fun tonight regardless.”

Charlie nodded and looked down curiously at where their hands were clasped on the seat between them. Was Astoria closer to her on the seat than she was before now? Slowly something was nagging at the back of Charlie’s mind. Something big she was missing.

But then she was distracted again when she looked out the Bentley’s tinted windows and noticed they weren’t headed downtown but instead out further, towards what looked like small airstrip. She belatedly realized she maybe should have asked more questions. Like where this concert was actually at? 

The Bentley was waved through the gate surrounding the airstip by a bored looking guard in a kiosk. It pulled up directly onto the runway towards a small private jet. 

Charlie once again had to change the level of wealth Astoria had access to on a whim way up in her head. 

The driver, who Charlie hadn’t seen yet behind the car’s partition, opened the door and helped Astoria out. Charlie scrambled out after her as she still hadn’t let go of her hand. Astoria turned and grinned at her widely. She was now taller than Charlie was by a good five inches as she was wearing high-heeled white leather buckled boots. She was sort of impressed she could even walk in those. Charlie wouldn’t have been able to. Astoria tugged on her hand and started to walk towards the white jet. 

Charlie muttered. “Ah, uh where is The Calico? That’s where we’re going still right?”

Astoria hummed happily. “West Hollywood. We’ll get there within an hour. This little one not as fast as the official Hybrid Tech jet but it works for my personal use. The doors open at 10, Bruno has been holding our spot on line of course as it’s festival seating.”

Charlie nodded carefully. Just what exactly had she gotten herself into here?

She had never been in a plane before either. It was a small six seater jet with the pilots taking up the first two seats. Astoria wedged them together in the back two seats which stretched across the aisle like a bench. She let go of her hand in order to fasten her seatbelt, Astoria frowned slightly and then fastened her own as well. The engines started to hum and alive and she tried not to jump at the sound and failed.

Astoria raised an eyebrow elegantly at her as she spoke loudly. “Haven’t you been on a small jet before? I’ll admit that the noise level is slightly unpleasant, but believe me it’s worth it for the convenience alone.”

Charlie had to shout when all she felt like doing was whispering. “No! I’ve never been on a plane before period!”

Astoria’s bright blue eyes went wide with realization. The electric blue they were outlined in made them look huge as she mouthed ‘oh’ before taking Charlie’s hand hard and raising her voice steadily. “Are you afraid of flying? If you want we can call all this off. I’m so sorry Charlie. I should have asked before I tried to whisk you away like this.”

Charlie wasn’t sure. She did want to go to the concert, she did want to keep hanging out with Astoria, she did want to eventually take a flight on a plane. Maybe not for the first time on this puddle jumper but, screw it. 

Charlie squeezed her hand back and tried to sound more confident than she felt. “I’ll be okay. I’m not afraid of heights at least, I used to be a competitive high diver in high school. You said it was only an hour right? I’m sure once we’re in the air it’ll be fine.”

Astoria smiled widely and leaned up against her, putting her head on her shoulder as she spoke. “That’s good, you’ll have to tell me more about that later, it sounds cool. I am a little afraid of heights though, so do you mind if I hold on to you?” Her teased up brown hair was a little scratchy on her cheek but Charlie didn’t want to move. She shook her head ‘no’ and leaned her shoulder up against hers as well. 

The plane shuddered and shook as it took off. Charlie tensed up involuntarily at the weightless feeling in her stomach as the wheels lifted off the tarmac. After that it was much smoother and she found herself craning her neck to look out the window down at the ground with wonder. This wasn’t actually bad! She could handle this! 

But Astoria still wanted to hold onto her for support so she didn’t move except to squeeze her hand reassuringly. They didn’t really try to talk over the buzzing thrum of the engines and before she realized it they were already landing. It was just one awkward bounce and then the wheels were smooth on the runway. After they taxied to stop Astoria led her by the hand to another waiting, identical Bentley. It almost felt like they hadn’t gone anywhere. 

They piled in the back and Astoria seemed more in her element as she told the driver to put on “Lita” in the cassette player. The synth keyboard blared at the beginning of “Kiss Me Deadly” as she rolled down the window, stuck her head out, and yelled. Charlie laughed and as the electric guitar in the song came on she stuck her head out the other window and howled. 

Astoria cackled and looked back inside at her. Charlie just grinned and then hollered again. She joined her until they were both screaming and laughing as lights of L.A. zipped past them. The streets they were barreling down looked dimmer and seedier where they were headed but Astoria didn’t seem to mind or care so Charlie didn’t try to either. 

When they pulled up at The Calico there was definitely a line of folks waiting to get in. A very conspicuous 6 foot 5 man with crewcut and black suit was standing stalk still at the head of the line. Astoria made her way over and some folks behind them grumbled about saving spots and line jumping but she didn’t seem to hear them or care. 

She thumped him affectionately on the arm as she spoke. “Thanks for saving our spots Bruno! When we get in I’ll go with you to get us drinks and Charlie can hold our place by the stage since it’s festival seating.” She winked at her and Charlie nodded slowly. Bruno nodded at her affectionately and then went back to staring ahead of them sternly. 

The legal drinking age was 21 but hardly anyone in the clubs in San Francisco checked id, let alone the ones in West Hollywood. Charlie didn’t hate the taste of booze so she wasn’t about to stop her. She didn’t really drink that often but one or two beers wouldn’t knock her off her ass. 

The doors opened and there was an excited rush as people started to push in around her. Luckily Bruno kept them from knocking both of them over as he moved like a solid wall through the crowd towards the front of the stage. While they lined up there Astoria let go of her hand and waved as she dragged Bruno after her towards the bar. 

More and more people started to crowd around her at the front of the stage and she was starting to get antsy when Astoria came barging back through the crowd towards her. Several people had to scramble bodily out of her way as she towered over them on her heeled boots and appeared to be almost as immovable as Bruno somehow. The crowd parted for her or risked getting trampled. 

She beamed at Charlie when she got back next to her, her hands braced on the gray barricade wall before the stage. It faltered for a second as she reached out to hand Charlie a black cherry Bartles and Jaymes. “I didn’t ask what you liked. I keep doing it I guess that’s uh not nice, hope a wine cooler is okay. I like sweet stuff but if you want a beer or like some vodka or something I can go get that too! Whatever you want, I’m sorry, I should have asked.”

Charlie was mostly amused that Astoria knew what a cheap wine cooler even, was so she took it graciously, popped the cap off on the lip of the barricade, and took a swig. It wasn’t bad. She didn’t have a fine wine palate or anything but she’d had worst tasting drinks before. 

Astoria was watching her with interest so Charlie smiled back at her and raised her bottle in a toast. “It’s pretty good actually. And for future reference I don’t hate beer but I think my favorite thing I’ve had so far has been gin. Not that I want to drink a lot of that right now.”

Astoria clinked her own fuzzy navel wine cooler with hers and smiled coyly as she sipped it. “I’ll keep that in mind in the future. That you’re a woman of fine tastes, one who prefers a G&T to a B&J.” 

Charlie tried not to choke on her drink as she snorted a laugh while Astoria just continued to smirk at her. They drank in warm silence for a little bit as the crowd pushed in around them, mostly other women dressed up as big and loud as Astoria, as they talked to each other excitedly. 

The opening act of the night was Vixen and everyone started to scream and sing along as they started to play. Charlie didn’t know the words so she watched Astoria’s mouth move along to their songs avidly and tried to sway a little to the music. 

Then when Lita Ford came on and opened with “Kiss Me Deadly” everyone started to jump up and down and bang their heads. Astoria was doing it too and looked over at her giddily. Charlie gave in, what the hell, when in hair metal Rome do as the metal heads did. She started to jump up and down and Astoria yelled happily as she reached out for her. They joined hands and started jump and dance together, throwing their hair around wildly and singing along. 

Everyone else around them was doing the same thing and it felt almost euphoric. This might not be her favorite type of music but right now she was having a blast. Astoria was too, neither one of them stopped dancing together and grinning wildly until the end of Lita’s set. She had even laughed a couple of times at how much fun this was. She would’ve never guessed almost moshing in a hair metal pit would be this enjoyable. 

Charlie was sweaty and kinda had a headache from the wine cooler but she still couldn’t stop smiling. Astoria’s grin was inspiring and she had been holding her hand the whole time, and looking at her like that. Like she was happier to see her than Lita Ford. 

_Wait...a minute. _

Charlie almost stopped in the middle of the street as they excited The Calico with the violent shock of her realization. That thought that had been nagging at the back of her brain all night finally slid into place as she looked over at Astoria. 

Was this a date!? 

Astoria was surprisingly strong though as she pulled Charlie out of the middle of the street towards the parked black Bentley. She looked back at her curiously and then they stopped against the car door in a small pile up. Charlie was looking up at her with wide brown doe eyes now. 

She wasn’t sure what her face was doing but Astoria’s was flushed and smiling brilliantly down at her. Okay this was probably a date. 

_Fuck. _

How had she missed that? And how did she ask that without revealing that she didn’t know it was a date for the whole rest of the night. Did she even want this to be a date? Shit. 

She’d had fun. Charlie didn’t have a lot of close friends, who were still around anyway, and Astoria was definitely her close friend now. But what if she wanted to be more than friends? Did Charlie want that too? There was a really obvious way to find out. 

She swallowed hard and leaned up towards her, Astoria didn’t pull away, instead watching her with wide interested eyes. Charlie reached up with the hand not holding hers and placed it on her cheek. It was so soft. She bit her lip and Astoria mirrored the action. Yeah okay she was for sure interested. The attraction wasn’t all in her head or one sided. Okay. 

Charlie was then struck with a terrible, awful, insufferably cheesy idea. She grinned and brought her lips close to Astoria’s before murmuring. “Kiss me once, kiss me twice, come on pretty baby k-” Astoria cut her off with ‘mph’ before she could finish the lyrics and then they were definitely kissing. She slid her hand around to the back of her neck and Astoria took her free hand and wrapped it around her lower back pulling her flush against her. 

_Yes! _

Alright. Charlie definitely wanted to be doing this, whatever this was. 

And of course Astoria kissed like she talked, fast, animatedly, and with well deserved confidence. Charlie had made out drunkenly at a couple of parties and once, memorably, with her roommate Mercy when she first moved in. But this was different. She liked Astoria, she knew her well enough to know she liked her as a person. Kissing like this was thrilling in a way that wasn’t just physical. Intimate, it was intimate. Although that physical part was very good too. Her heart pounded in her ears as their lips rasped against each other. 

Astoria actually broke it off first and gasped for air as she leaned back from Charlie, her blue eyes blown wide and her pink lipstick a little smeared. “Ah. I have wanted to do that for, well for a couple weeks now, but I wasn’t sure you’d, you know, want to too? Again I assumed something without asking you. I’ll stop doing that. I’ve learned my lesson I promise.”

Charlie smiled appreciatively up at her. “To be fair I didn’t realize I wanted to do that till just now so I think it’s okay. But yup, asking me what I want is gonna get you some better answers than just assuming you know. For future reference.” 

Astoria bit her lip while smiling at her deviously and moved to open the door. They slid in and then she shut the door and the car started to move. She turned to her as she leaned in closer. “Alright then Miss Watson, would you like to keep kissing me until we get to the airport?”

Charlie laughed and leaned in and kissed her on the nose. Astoria looked confused before she started to playfully pepper kisses all over her face. Then they were both laughed and touched and it was wonderful. Hands and mouths and sighs. 

Girls were so soft, okay not always, Charlie wasn’t soft. Her hands were calloused from hard work and motor grease, but Astoria was soft. Holy shit, strong too! She effortlessly pulled Charlie over into her lap and that was it. Charlie was all in. This was great! 

They did indeed kiss all the way back to the airport. Charlie put her arm around her shoulders and they pressed against each other, holding hands the whole flight back to San Francisco. 

Charlie was exhausted by the time they were finally pulling up to her apartment at 3 am but she didn’t have to open the Orange Julius today. She’d at least get six hours of sleep till she had to get up at go back to the mall. But as Astoria leaned out the lowered car window and kissed her goodnight, Charlie found she didn’t care about sleep. The taste of that peachy wine cooler on her lips, the hot press of her tongue against hers in her mouth, the pinch of her sparkly blue and pink nails as they dug into her shoulder and scalp. That was what kept her up. 

**Author's Note:**

> Another fic with a pairing no one knew they wanted till now!!! Woo! 
> 
> I did so much 80s California research to make this mostly accurate. I didn't fudge the dates or like any of the brands lol. Orange Julius has existed in California since 1926!!! All the slang and the songs and even the height of a regulation high dive, are accurate lol. 
> 
> Also I had to make this super aggressively Queer. Charlie is oblivious until she isn't and then she's just like "Hell yeah Astoria is hot and nice and a good kisser."
> 
> Meanwhile Astoria is dying a little because she had been trying to seduce this cute soft butch rocker chick for weeks to no avail and now they're making out, finally, FINALLY! I can't wait to write more of this because they are super cute and also Bee and PG are super cute, and all four of them together is...really hot.


End file.
